


I Think the Spotlight Always Gives You Stage Fright

by baekingneeds



Series: 12 Days of Chanbaek Christmas 2017 [7]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, M/M, band au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-31
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2019-02-24 16:15:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13217430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baekingneeds/pseuds/baekingneeds
Summary: On Christmas Eve, Chanyeol brings Baekhyun to a faraway place to help the vocalist with something the other has been struggling with for a long time. It's unconventional but it might just be what Baekhyun needs.Deleted scene from Camera Shy (but you're still a star)





	I Think the Spotlight Always Gives You Stage Fright

**Author's Note:**

> I'm more than halfway done!! Woohooooo!! (except it's really killing me trying to complete a fic every day especially because I'm always out the whole day OTL)
> 
> This fic is a deleted scene from [Camera Shy (but you're still a star)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12833157). Deleted because I didn't have enough inspiration to write it finish in time for Chanyeol's birthday :x you don't have to read it but you'll just get a better understanding if you have read the story!
> 
> As usual, this is going to sound repetitive but writers really love and appreciate all comments so [Tweet](https://twitter.com/baekingneeds) me if you enjoyed reading this or slip into my DMs or just let me know because they make me really happy <333
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> xoxo

“Where are we going?” Baekhyun asks, his head resting on Chanyeol’s shoulder.

The cab has been driving for an hour and Baekhyun still has no idea where they're headed. Chanyeol called him this morning, telling him to get ready to go out and that was it, no details, no nothing. Also, Chanyeol didn’t really give him much time to prepare because he was already waiting below Baekhyun’s apartment complex with a cab. But Baekhyun has always been one for an adventure, so he agreed without much thought.

Sitting in the backseat while hearing only the drone of the car’s air-con because the radio’s spoilt is certainly making Baekhyun regret his choice.

“Chanyeol?” Baekhyun calls, lifting his head slightly to look at the drummer only to see that the other is fast asleep. Scoffing, Baekhyun shakes his head before leaning against Chanyeol’s shoulder again.

The drummer must be exhausted with all their late-night practices. 4 Spaces’ first tour is coming up and this is going to be Chanyeol’s first time appearing with the band on an official tour. It isn’t going to be his first appearance as a member of 4 Spaces but performing live at small gigs and charity events and performing live at a concert venue filled with fans are two extremely different things. On top of that, Chanyeol has to learn and master all of 4 Spaces’ existing songs. It isn’t an easy task seeing how long the band has been around.

“You’re doing fine,” Baekhyun says softly, smiling as he closed his eyes, deciding that he can use some rest himself. Being the vocalist isn’t an easy job either.

Baekhyun doesn’t see the way Chanyeol’s lips curve upwards into a small smile.

 

When Baekhyun wakes up, the cab isn’t moving anymore and he’s still resting on Chanyeol’s shoulder.

“Good morning,” Chanyeol greets a little too chirpily for someone who was sleeping throughout the car ride.

“Are we there yet?” Baekhyun asks groggily. “Wherever we’re supposed to be at,” he adds bitterly and hears Chanyeol chuckle.

“The car isn’t moving anymore, take a guess,” Chanyeol teases.

Sitting up grouchily, Baekhyun looks around to try getting his bearings. Spotting himself in the car’s rearview mirror, his eyes widen comically and he lets out a loud gasp. Immediately, his hands fly to his hair to pat it down, making it less poofy and more fluffy. Carefully, he arranges a few wayward silver strands and tucks a tuft of hair behind his ear. Blindly, he reaches into his bag and somehow successfully pulls out a black mask before covering his mouth with it. He doesn’t have any make-up on his face and he blames Chanyeol for it.

“Are you done? Because the cab has been stationary for the past ten minutes but the metre’s still running.”

Turning to Chanyeol with a scowl, Baekhyun grabs his bag. “Why didn’t you say so earlier?” He pushes open his side of the door and gets out of the cab before Chanyeol even replies.

“You were sleeping,” Chanyeol explains as he exits the cab. “I didn’t want to wake you up.”

Walking over the driver who was taking a smoke against the cab, Chanyeol hands the man a few notes for the fare and tells him to keep the change. The vocalist watches the driver insisting on Chanyeol waiting a little while he gets the change as Chanyeol argues back that it’s okay for a while until he decides that he can’t take the cold any longer despite his very warm winter coat and loudly thanks the driver for his help before pulling Chanyeol away by the arm.

“Thank you!” Chanyeol shouts to the driver and the man gives him a thumbs up in return.

Only when Baekhyun reaches a large building does he stop and release his hold on Chanyeol’s arm. He raises a brow when he sees the panel hanging in front of the building. It’s probably the building’s name.

“You brought me to,” Baekhyun pauses and squints his eyes. “The “Magical Kingdome”…”, the signboard says, with a bright yellow star behind. He frowns, thinking that something doesn’t sound quite right. “The “Magical Kingdome” plus a shining star,” he repeats, adding the description at the back because he doesn’t know what sounds do emojis make, and his frown deepens. Turning to Chanyeol, Baekhyun waves a hand at the building. “King _dome_? Is it really Kingdome or did someone paint an extra ‘e’ up there? And why is there a star?”

“It’s King _dome_ , alright,” Chanyeol stresses the second syllable on purpose just to be annoying. “It’s a theatre, sort-of. And the star’s only up there when Christmas is near.”

“You…” Baekhyun knits his brows together in confusion. “You brought me to a sort-of theatre that has a questionable name with a shining star during Christmas season?”

Looking at Baekhyun and matching his frown, Chanyeol very seriously says, “no”, before walking into the building.

“Isn’t this trespassing?” Baekhyun hisses as he quickly follows Chanyeol inside.

Looking around, Baekhyun notices several photo frames hanging on the walls. Every photo has a stage in it, the only differences in them are the people standing on the stage. They’re mostly children, some with musical instruments, some with microphones, and all dressed in elaborate costumes.

“You brought me to a sort-of theatre that has a questionable name such as the _Magical King **dome**_ with a shining star that has lots of photos of children performing on stage. That is so not creepy.”

“Can you stop saying that?” Chanyeol stops walking to turn and scowl at Baekhyun.

The vocalist almost knocks into the drummer’s back but he stops himself in time and smiles at Chanyeol. “Stop saying what? The Magical Kingdo – ”

Chanyeol fixes him with a look and Baekhyun rolls his eyes. The vocalist lifts his hands up. “Fine. I surrender.”

Satisfied, Chanyeol continues walking as Baekhyun sticks his tongue out.

“You should still tell me where we’re going and what we’re doing here,” Baekhyun says when he catches up with Chanyeol, falling into step with the taller. “I mean you did only tell me…hmm what _did_ you tell me? Oh, that’s right! Nothing!”

Chuckling, Chanyeol looks to his side and laughs even more when he finds Baekhyun glaring at him. “You know, the only thing that is slightly intimidating about your look is the black mask covering your pouty lips.” He shuts his mouth immediately and wishes he can take back a few words, namely ‘pouty’ because Baekhyun hasn’t acknowledged his confession at all and it’s been _weeks_.

An awkward silence falls between them, the only sound around them is coming from their shoes tapping against the linoleum floor. Chanyeol is internally scolding himself and panicking because what if Baekhyun suddenly gets reminded of Chanyeol letting out his secret to Kyungsoo and gets mad at him and walks away and fires Chanyeol from 4 Spaces and hates him for life and –

Baekhyun breaks the silence and Chanyeol’s train of thoughts. “I like it better when you were only my fan and stumbling around me all the time. You were so much cuter back then,” he jokes and Chanyeol smiles at him sheepishly.

“I’m still your number one fan, Baek,” Chanyeol admits and Baekhyun laughs heartily, his eyes scrunching up at the sides.

“So, number one fan, will you tell me where we’re going?” As Chanyeol’s about to finally answer him, Baekhyun stops walking to stare at one photo.

As soon as Baekhyun stops in his tracks, Chanyeol follows suit and looks questioningly at Baekhyun. He notices the vocalist looking at a photo and wonders what’s so interesting about it. When Chanyeol sees the photo himself, his face colours in embarrassment.

The vocalist turns to Chanyeol, grinning mischievously as he points to the photo. “Is that you, Chanyeol?”

Laughing, Baekhyun looks at the photo again. There’s a little boy in the picture wearing a caterpillar costume but his ears are sticking out and Baekhyun guesses that they’re not supposed to. The boy’s eyes are large and round like a certain drummer who’s currently standing next to Baekhyun.

“It’s you, isn’t it!” Baekhyun exclaims, turning to Chanyeol again.

“Yes,” Chanyeol grumbles and leans in to take a closer look at the photo. “I can’t believe they still have this.”

“Who? The creepy owner of this building?” Baekhyun asks and Chanyeol looks at him pointedly.

“Magical King _dome_ ,” Chanyeol starts and Baekhyun throws his head back in laughter. “Is a place that is free for public access, so to answer your earlier question, we are _not_ trespassing. I say it’s a theatre sort-of place because there are a few performance halls here that allow people to practice on stage for anything – a play, a competition, anything, you know?”

Baekhyun hums, interested.

“That,” Chanyeol continues as he points to the photo. “Was when I was five. I was in a school play and I wanted the lead, duh. But I got casted as a caterpillar which was basically a sidekick role. I was so embarrassed and the costume looks so ridiculous, doesn’t it?”

“I think it’s cute,” Baekhyun muses and Chanyeol scoffs.

“That’s because you weren’t the one who had to wear it. Anyway, I couldn’t put on the costume without crying because it looks ridiculous and don’t tell me otherwise. Also, I was taller than most five-year-olds so it looked even more ridiculous on me. Five-year-old caterpillars weren’t supposed to look as big as me.” He took a deep breath before continuing. “So, my sister decided to bring me here. There was one performance hall empty so she simply walked in and told me to put on the caterpillar costume and go on stage. I was so mortified and I was crying and kicking, begging her to take me home but she refused and insisted that I went up.”

“Then what happened?” Baekhyun was looking at Chanyeol now.

The drummer grinned. “She had to force me into the costume but she managed to dress me up anyway and then she carried me onto the stage and stood with me. She pointed at the empty seats in the audience and told me that everyone was here to see me then she started to clap and cheer by herself. I thought she was mad and I told her that no one was there.”

Baekhyun laughs and whacks Chanyeol on the shoulder. “Gosh, you were such a bitter kid.”

Chanyeol shrugs, laughing along with Baekhyun. “So she told me that people would be watching me on the actual day of the school play and I told her that people weren’t there to see me.” He looks at Baekhyun. “Bitter kid, I know.” He turns his attention back to the photo. “But then she told me that she would be and so would my parents and that they were all going to be cheering for me. And then she started cheering on her own again and I found her so embarrassing, even more than the costume that I was wearing. Before I realised, I wasn’t crying anymore and the tears had all dried up. She told me to do my best before hopping off the stage and sitting in the front row and giving me two thumbs up and shouting how much she loves me. And just like that, all the fear and embarrassment went away.”

When Chanyeol looks at Baekhyun again, he notices the other staring at him with a peculiar smile.

“What?” he asks, laughing nervously, not used to such scrutiny from the vocalist.

“Your sister’s awesome,” Baekhyun says.

Nodding, Chanyeol grins. “That she is.”

The vocalist smiles at the picture. “Chanyeol the caterpillar. I like that.”

Rolling his eyes, Chanyeol continues walking again. “Let’s go.”

Baekhyun’s about to follow him when another photo catches his eyes. “You played the piano?”

Turning to look at the other photo, Chanyeol sees a younger version of himself sitting on a bench in front of a grand piano in the frame. “I _play_ the piano,” he corrects. “What about it?” He raises a brow at Baekhyun.

“Nothing,” the vocalist admits with a casual shrug. “I play it too.”

Chuckling, Chanyeol continues walking and this time, Baekhyun follows.

“So what are we doing here?” Baekhyun asks. “Chanyeol?”

“Hm?”

“What are we doing here? Where are we going?” Baekhyun’s continues to prod curiously.

The drummer turns a corner and Baekhyun follows, slowing down when he sees a large door at the end of the corridor.

“Chanyeol,” Baekhyun says wearily, not liking where they’re heading towards. “Chanyeol,” Baekhyun repeats when Chanyeol opens the pair of doors, revealing the backstage of a performance hall and Baekhyun heaves a sigh of relief. “Are we here to watch a performance or something?”

Stopping in front of the curtains, Chanyeol looks at Baekhyun. “No. You’re here to sing.”

“Chanyeol,” Baekhyun says weakly. “I can’t.” He starts to back away. “You can’t ask me to do this suddenly.

“There’s no one out there. It’s just me,” Chanyeol tries convincing Baekhyun, taking hold of the vocalist’s hands to stop him from running away. “Just trust me.”

Staring into the drummer’s eyes, Baekhyun saw how earnest the other is and he can’t help but nod his head, deciding to place all his faith in the drummer.

Smiling, Chanyeol passed him a microphone and Baekhyun raises his eyebrows in surprise. He didn’t even notice when Chanyeol took a microphone.

“It’s turned on.” Chanyeol nods at the microphone, encouraging Baekhyun to take it.

With a sigh, Baekhyun plucks the microphone from Chanyeol’s hand as he tries to stop his hand from shaking. “What song should I sing?”

“Anything you want to sing,” Chanyeol answers with a smile and Baekhyun finds the courage to smile back. “Just keep on singing no matter what.”

Nodding, Baekhyun grips the microphone tightly. “Acapella?” he asks with a short laugh and Chanyeol nods.

Breathing in deep, Baekhyun counts to three in his head as the introduction to a song that he likes starts to play in his head. He opens his mouth and at the part of the music when the vocal begins, Baekhyun starts to sing.

His voice is gentle and sweet, like melted chocolate coating an ice-cream atop a cone.

The melody is familiar to Chanyeol’s ears and he recognises it as the song he heard at the bar a few months back when Jongin stood in for Kyungsoo to sing. Seeing that Baekhyun’s eyes are closed, Chanyeol quietly and very carefully sneaks out the curtains.

When the song comes to an end, Baekhyun opens his eyes, smiling proudly at himself. He looks around for Chanyeol and panics when he doesn’t see the drummer. “Chan,” he accidentally says into the microphone before he pulls away. “Chanyeol?” he calls out softly, covering the microphone with his hand in case if it's able to pick up his voice. When he doesn’t receive any response, he tries again, more urgently this time. “Chanyeol?”

Again, he doesn’t get a response and he can feel himself on the brink of tears. There’s a gnawing sensation in his stomach, clawing at him from the inside and he feels like everything around him is crumbling into pieces.

Suddenly, he thinks about Chanyeol’s words to him. _“Just keep on singing no matter what.”_

“Okay, Baekhyun. Deep breaths. You can do this,” the vocalist tells himself, inhaling and exhaling slowly as he calms himself down.

Taking in one last deep breath, Baekhyun brings the microphone to his lips again. As Chanyeol’s words replay in his mind, Baekhyun begins a new song.

At the end of the song, Baekhyun’s feeling more confident than before. He’s forgotten that he’s standing on a stage, holding a microphone and singing behind a curtain that’s hiding a few hundred seats. None of it matters at the moment. All that Baekhyun can think about is the feel of singing note after note, bringing meaning to each and every word he sings.

When he finishes the ninth or tenth song (he isn’t exactly keeping count), he’s almost out of breath and his throat feels dry but he feels more self-assured than he has in a very long time. All of a sudden, he hears someone clapping and he freezes. But then there’s a shout of encouragement followed by some cheering and Baekhyun recognises that it’s Chanyeol’s voice. A small smile starts to creep onto his face, thinking about how Chanyeol’s the only one sitting out there in the big hall, acting as his sole audience. The smile slowly slips away when he hears more clapping and more cheering, coming from different sides of the curtain. His face pales when he hears unfamiliar voices calling his name and he almost faints when he sees the curtain move.

The red cloth parts slowly and Baekhyun is too afraid to move or to do anything so he stands still, feet rooted to the ground as his breathing becomes laboured. As the curtain reveals the centre row, Baekhyun shuts his eyes tight.

His closed eyelids are suddenly filled with light and Baekhyun has done this enough times to know that the spotlight is shining on him and him only. But he’s too scared to open his eyes and now he feels immensely embarrassed with himself.

“Baekhyun?” a voice calls out. It’s a familiar voice but Baekhyun can’t quite put a name or face to the person’s voice. He’s afraid that it’s all in his head. “Baekhyun? Baek? Baek!”

Opening his eyes, Baekhyun takes in a deep breath and sees Chanyeol standing in front of him, looking concerned. He peeks behind Chanyeol and sees that the hall is empty save for them both. Then what was all that just now?

There’s a cheer again and Baekhyun frantically looks around for the source until Chanyeol grabs him by the shoulders to calm him down.

“Baek, it’s just the speakers. I’m playing them. See?” he pushes the play button on his phone and the shouts come from the speakers around the hall just like Chanyeol mentioned.

Not knowing what to say and heart still beating rapidly, Baekhyun simply stares at Chanyeol wordless before he swallows and then pushes Chanyeol away before running off the stage, ignoring the giant calling after him and shouting his name.

He runs and runs until he’s in the corridor where he first spotted Chanyeol the Caterpillar, then he slows down and comes to a stop in front of the picture. He’s feeling a bit of anger mixed with some confusion and strangely, a lot of joy. As he looks at five-year-old Chanyeol in the photo, the anger slowly fades and it is all replaced by an inexplicable sense of happiness.

“Baek!” Chanyeol catches up to the vocalist, panting when he stops next to the shorter.

Baekhyun turned to him with wide eyes.

The drummer looks apologetic and worried, but most of all, guilty and Baekhyun wants to ask what’s wrong but his throat’s too parched for him to say a word.

“I’m sorry,” Chanyeol rushes out as he gestures around uselessly with his hands. “I don’t know. I wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry. Oh my gosh, Baek, I’m so sorry. I just thought…I thought that this was a good idea. Ugh I’m an idiot!” he runs a hand through his hair and messes his brown locks up.

But Baekhyun isn’t angry and he wants to tell Chanyeol. He wants to say ‘thank you’ because he feels happy and confident. Because what Chanyeol did was actually great and he’s shocked himself at how he’s feeling about it. But he’s also exhausted and paralysed with fear from before despite not feeling afraid anymore and so his face remains passive, almost expressionless and Chanyeol looks increasingly more and more scared by the second.

“You did well, Baek…” Chanyeol says with a small smile and Baekhyun feels his heart swell with pride.

All he’s able to do is to give Chanyeol a small nod and the drummer’s smile widen but it still doesn’t quite reach his ear and Baekhyun just wants to pull the giant into a bone-crushing hug to tell him ‘thank you’.

But he doesn’t.

 

Nighttime has long fallen by the time they exit the building. The sky’s completely dark with a few visible stars shining dimly because there aren’t any clouds tonight. There’s a cab waiting outside and Chanyeol walks towards it, Baekhyun following behind.

The vocalist slows down suddenly and looks back at the building, now glowing brightly with all the fairy lights surrounding it. Baekhyun didn’t notice the wires wrapped all around the building earlier. There’s also a small Christmas tree at the corner that he didn’t notice earlier. He smiles at the building one last time before turning around.

Chanyeol’s standing in front of the cab, holding the door open for Baekhyun, waiting for the vocalist to go in.

It’s freezing, even more so than this morning because the sun’s not even out anymore and Baekhyun thinks Chanyeol is an idiot. Not wanting the other to unnecessarily remain out in the cold any longer, Baekhyun quickens his footsteps and enters the cab. The drummer goes in shortly after and after they both fasten their seatbelts, the cab starts moving.

While this morning, Baekhyun sat in the centre seat so that he could lean on Chanyeol’s shoulder, he’s sitting behind the driver’s seat now, resting his head against the cold glass window. The centre seat remains empty and there’s only a small distance between them but Chanyeol feels so far away.

They don’t talk in the cab so it’s absolutely quiet. For some reason, the radio’s also broken in this cab and Baekhyun wants to fill the silence so much but he doesn’t know what to say. Things ended awkwardly back at the stage and he isn’t angry but he doesn’t know how to start talking to Chanyeol. Also, he’s tired. They’ve been out the whole day.

Sliding further down the seat, Baekhyun makes himself comfortable and closes his eye, willing sleep to come.

He doesn’t know how long they’ve been on the road but he knows that they’re in the city based on what he can see from the window. And no, he hasn’t slept at all. He wasn’t able to, not with how awkward things are with Chanyeol at the moment, especially because he doesn’t even have any idea how the day ended up like this.

“Baekhyun,” Chanyeol begins softly, probably only talking because he thinks Baekhyun is asleep. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry if you didn’t want to do any of that. I’m sorry for randomly bringing you here. I’m sorry,” he sighs. “I’m sorry if you were scared.”

From the reflection in the window, Baekhyun sees Chanyeol turn to look at him worriedly, his eyes gently and it makes Baekhyun feel warm on the inside. Their eyes meet in the window and now Chanyeol knows that Baekhyun is awake, he shifts slightly closer to the vocalist, hoping he can get a response to the other.

 _“It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s okay,”_ Baekhyun’s mind screams for him to say because it _is_ okay. He isn’t blaming Chanyeol for anything at all and he wants to tell the other that so much but he’s unable to find his voice to say those two simple words. Seeing how hopeful Chanyeol looks makes Baekhyun feel horrible. Squeezing his eyes shut, Baekhyun tries to find the courage to say it. But when he opens his eyes, all he sees is sadness in Chanyeol’s eyes and his mouth goes dry again.

Finally, Chanyeol sighs and looks out of the other window.

After a while, Baekhyun slowly turns his head away from the window and looks at the back of Chanyeol’s head. He lowers his gaze and they land on Chanyeol’s right hand splayed out across the centre seat. Inhaling deeply, Baekhyun slowly moves his left hand over to Chanyeol’s and then rests his hand on top of it.

The sudden touch makes Chanyeol whip his head towards Baekhyun in surprise, his eyes wide and hopeful again. Baekhyun offers him a small smile and nods his head, telling Chanyeol that everything’s okay. A smile appears on Chanyeol’s own face as he flips his right hand over to interlace his finger with Baekhyun’s.

Looking down at their hands with a wider smile, Baekhyun briefly glances at Chanyeol one more time before looking out the window again. Chanyeol’s hand is huge but it feels like it fits perfectly with his and Baekhyun suddenly feels light and warm all over like a heavy object is being lifted off his chest.

He closes his eyes and squeezes Chanyeol’s hand. “Thank you,” he whispers, not sure if Chanyeol can hear him but he hopes that Chanyeol gets his message from the hand squeeze.

As he drifts off to sleep, he feels Chanyeol tightening his grip.

 

 

“Wait, you what?” Jongdae asks, not quite believing his own ears. “You brought Baekhyun where? To Magical Kingdome? Like King _dome_? Are you hearing this, Minseok?” Jongdae is still staring at Chanyeol in shock. “Minseok?!” he turns to the bassist and finds the other nodding while looking at his phone. “Minseok!” he hisses.

“What?” The bassist is so surprised at Jongdae’s outburst that he loses his grip on his phone. “Chanyeol brought Baekhyun to a building called Kingdome on Christmas Eve, so what?”

“King _dome_!” Jongdae heaves out.

“Yes, Kingdome,” Minseok echoes, puzzled about what all the fuss is about. Frowning, he picks up his phone and continues to surf the internet.

“King _dome_ ,” Jongdae says to Chanyeol and the drummer nods slowly.

“Baekhyun had the same reaction…” Chanyeol mutters.

“Kind _dome_ ,” Jongdae repeats like a parrot.

“Plus a shining star!” Baekhyun exclaims as he walks into their shared dressing room.

“What?” Jongdae deadpans.

Grinning, Baekhyun shares a conspiratorial look with Chanyeol who smirks back.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos are appreciated!
> 
> Say hi to me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/baekingneeds)! Tweer or DM me, I'm really friendly I don't bite lols
> 
> xoxo


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